


The Awakening

by Raiadel



Series: Jaesa's Awakening [6]
Category: Star Wars Legends: The Old Republic
Genre: F/M, Interruptions (again), Lightsaber Creation, Propositions, Quinncident, Relationship progress, Shopping, Sparring, Transponder Station, Vaiken, equals catalyst, im new, not enough for an M rating? i think?, plus feelings, some mature bits, tell me if i screwed up the rating
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-17
Updated: 2017-04-17
Packaged: 2018-10-20 00:52:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,573
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10651581
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Raiadel/pseuds/Raiadel
Summary: Discussion, betrayal, and the awakening. All's fair in love and war.Vette walks in on something she wishes she didn't see, Quinn is being a sketchy bastard, and Jaesa and Khryden hop onto the Emotional Rollercoaster for a wild ride.





	The Awakening

**Author's Note:**

> Oooh boy, here it comes. A long chapter, too. Proceed with caution, kiddies. Some adult themes/interactions ahead, but nothing too explicit. Not enough for an M rating, I think, but let me know if you disagree. I’d rather be safe than sorry.

As soon as the ship was given the approval to leave, Jaesa headed for her meditation room, already feeling unbalanced with the lack of her saber hanging at her side. It wasn't just that the weight had disappeared, that lightsaber had been the first she had made, way back on Tython. She smirked as she settled into a cross-legged meditation position in front of the kolto tank. In a way, she felt like she was finally free. Putting a red lightsaber crystal in her Jedi hilt had been the beginning of her transition, and this loss was middle. The moment she locked the components of her new lightsaber together with the Force would be the end. In that way, she felt the loss profoundly because it had more than her first lightsaber, it had been a symbol of her Jedi status. Then when Khryden accepted her as his apprentice, the lightsaber became a symbol of her transition. The Sith red crystal housed in a Jedi construct, a juxtaposition that reflected her fall. And now, her new hilt signified her new life as a Sith.

She felt the loss keenly, but couldn't be bothered to be sad about it.

Loss was funny like that.

Deep in her meditation, she barely felt the ship jerk as it left the hangar of Voss’s space station, then the rumbling of the hyperdrive as the ship jumped to hyperspace. But she perked up immediately when she sensed Khryden leave his room and head for the cargo hold. Slipping out of her meditation, she spent a moment of silence just sitting and enjoying the calm atmosphere with the (blessedly empty) kolto tank bubbling in her ears.

Achieving equilibrium, she stood, raising her hood to shadow her face. Pulling Force stealth over her body, she slipped out of the room and down the hallway, steps soundless.

From the doorway to the cargo hold that had been repurposed into a training room, she viewed her master, wearing tight workout clothes, warming up with a single practice blade in his hand. She leaned casually against the wall, watching appreciatively as his clothes stretched across well-developed muscles.

He started forms slowly at first, warming up his arms and legs, then sped up, the practice blade blurring through the air. His eyes were closed as he concentrated on his movement, but a small smile slid over his lips as he sensed her presence. Jaesa admired the view for another minute before silently picking up a practice blade from the rack and dropping her stealth a few strides away.

He changed his pattern abruptly, thrusting his blade in her direction. She stepped into it, catching the tip on her blade and sliding it down to her hilt. His eyes popped open and he raised an eyebrow at her.

_I'm surprised you left your perch by the door. I was looking forward to putting on a show for you._

He ducked away, disengaging, and they slowly circled each other, waiting for the other to make the first move.

_Hmm_. She twirled her blade. _I was definitely tempted. But you can't practice against invisible enemies and still improve._

He smirked, his mental voice adopting a seductive tone. _I can't? Then show me how I can improve, master._

She swallowed as a tsunami of heat swamped her body, forcing her nearly to distraction as she barely blocked his next attack with her blade. _That's not playing fair_ , she growled out as she struck back. _You're purposefully distracting me_.

He blocked her assault easily. _War isn't fair. Why should love be?_ He grinned.

_Because...Because...Oh, you clever bastard._ Jaesa feinted to the outside, then spun, whipping her blade in an opposite riposte. He grunted as he parried with both hands, using brute strength to shove her backwards and off balance. She stumbled, throwing out a hand to brace herself against a crate as Khryden pressed the attack, blade moving faster as he tried to overwhelm her. Ducking under a particularly brutal strike, Jaesa popped up on his side, passing the practice sword to her left hand mid-movement, and slammed a karate chop into his side and jabbing his kidney with two lightning quick strikes.

A pained cry sounded behind her as she ducked away and she flinched as she spun around. Khryden was doubled over, blade discarded with one hand supporting him against the crates and the other clutching his side.

Jaesa clapped a hand over her mouth. “Oh, Force, that’s your injured side, isn't it?” Panting, she dropped to a knee besides him, hand on his back. “Are you ok?”

He nodded his head, face flushed, and sat heavily on the ground, back against the crate. She followed him a moment later and placed a hand on his thigh in a silent apology.

“No, that was good,” he wheezed. “Good use of your environment and identifying your enemy’s weaknesses. Voss healing is effective, but not perfect. There are still some tender spots.” He massaged his bitten side gently with his fingertips.

The corners of her mouth tugged down, exposing her displeasure. “Sure, but not against you. Vana-Xo did say that it would take time for you to heal, a side effect of using her own energy versus someone else’s. That was a cheap shot, I know.”

He trapped her hand with one of his own against his leg. “When sparring, I suppose. Just don’t be afraid to fight dirty when it counts.”

She caught his eye and gave him a saucy wink. “I _always_ fight dirty.”

He chuckled. “I walked right into that one.” Leaning his head back against the crate, he stared resolutely at the ceiling.

They fell into comfortable silence as Khryden’s thumb started moving in idle circles lightly on the back of her hand.

“I’m sorry.”

Her breath snagged in her throat as her mind, blissfully blank before, exploded with a hundred different responses and conversation directions. Heart pounding, she watched him out of the corner of her eye. This was it.

“I screwed up, I know. I see that now.” He swallowed hard. “I’m so used to having to protect those I care about, that I rarely think about their feelings. Your feelings. Having to think about another is a new experience.” He turned suddenly, tucking one leg underneath him and grabbing her hands. He stared at their interlocking fingers for a second before raising his soulful gaze. “I promise, I’ll try to be better. To treat you with the respect and love you deserve. Will you…give me another chance? Since I effectively vaporized the last one?”

Ignoring the fluttering in her chest, Jaesa looked him square in the eye. “And I’m sorry about Nar Shaddaa. It was an emotional night, and I was trying to prove something I didn’t need to.”

“We were both a little flustered.” He nodded slowly.

Jaesa squeezed his hands with a reassuring smile. It wasn’t a complete explanation on his end or apology on hers, but it was a start. It was enough to get this relationship jumpstarted again and right now, that was all that she wanted.

Khryden’s next exhalation was a shuddered breath. “Can we try this again?

She was suddenly aware of his fingers inching up her forearms and she suppressed a shiver as warmth flared in her core. “Try what again?”

His palms caressed the tops of her biceps. “Everything. I want to start fresh. But maybe we can begin with Nar Shaddaa? I remember a particular moment that some very rude bounty hunters interrupted...”

This time she did shiver as his hands skimmed back down over her bare arms. “I…could be persuaded to continue that moment. But you have to promise me one thing.” She raised a delicate finger in the space between their noses.

“What’s that?”

Jaesa was pleased to hear him sound breathless as she trailed her other hand up the outside of his thigh while sidling her face closer. Opening her mouth as if to speak, her eyes flashed predatorily and she planted both hands against his shoulders and pushed. She followed him down, their legs tangling, and used her weight to pin him against the floor.

“This time I get to be in control,” she purred in his ear.

Heat flared intensely in his eyes and he let out a low groan as she wiggled to get a better angle. “You torture me, woman.”

“Tsk tsk,” she scolded lightly, even as her desire flared at his husky voice. “We have to take turns. Didn’t you ever learn turns in Sith school?”

He narrowed his eyes playfully, a sly smile dancing on his lips. “No, but…” Khryden hooked her arms with one of his, effectively trapping them as he rolled them over, pinning Jaesa to the training room’s floor. Hands restrained her wrists on either side of her head, his weight lending them strength. His lips brushed her ear in direct similarity to how she had done it moments before and she trembled under his touch. “…in Sith school, I learned how to _fight_.”

A burning fire lit in her chest, the yearning nearly consuming her whole. She tensed her muscles, lust fueling her strength and desire to fight back. Jerking her wrists free with a low growl, Jaesa tangled her fingers through his hair and tugged his face down, crashing her lips against his. It started inelegantly, the product of depravation and excitement, but morphed into pure need as she let out a moan, arching her back in an attempt to get closer. He groaned in response and shifted his weight to press more firmly against her, their bond pulsing with an overflow of passion.

Khryden pressed one forearm against the floor to hold himself up so he didn’t crush her, leaving the other free to slide down her side and over her bare ribs and up her stomach before coming to rest on the upper hem of her midriff baring robes, fingers resting between her covered breasts. Jaesa’s hands clawed at his shirt, fueled by lust in their desperate quest to touch more. Sliding a singular finger between the hem and her skin, he crooked the tip, pressing his nail lightly into her delicate skin and dragging agonizingly slowly down to her belly button. Fire followed his fingertip, inciting within her a blaze unlike any other.

A buzzing noise sounded from somewhere off to their side, but both Khryden and Jaesa were too otherwise occupied to notice.

Curling her fingers around the hem of his shirt, Jaesa tugged the material up to expose his chest, running her palms appreciatively over defined abdominal and pectoral muscles, hard from vigorous training. Ridges from old scars were present but few, and Jaesa traced those she found with reverence. Here, embedded into his skin, was proof of his fierceness and experience.

The buzzing continued, finally penetrating the haze that surrounded them and Khryden broke the kiss to cast a dark glare at where his ringing holocom lay on one of the crates.

Seeing her chance to keep him here fast expiring, Jaesa tipped her head up and nibbled his bottom lip. “Don’t leave.”

He loosed a lust tinged sigh, dropping several pecking kisses on her lips. “What if it’s important?”

“Forget about it,” she mumbled between kisses. “If it’s so important, they can come get you themselves.”

Taking advantage of his distraction, Jaesa yanked his shirt over his head and flung it aside, trailing kisses down his neck and across his bare collarbone as her hands slid over his ribs to his back. Her nails dug in as he tried to rise, prompting a warm, resonating chuckle as he dipped back down to capture her lips for one more kiss.

“You little minx,” he murmured against her lips. “What if the ship’s on fire?”

He skimmed a hand over her clothed breasts and she gasped as she arched her back, trying to increase the pressure. “Then the alarm would be going off!”

Nipping at her jaw playfully, Khryden grinned. “What if the crew got abducted?”

A half-whine, half-growl rippled from her chest. “We only need two people to fly the ship!”

He lowered his lips to her ear, nibbling her lobe amidst her mewls. “What if I said,” he whispered entrancingly, “that I’d rather this happen in my bed than on the training room floor?”

Jaesa screwed up her face as if in physical pain. Lust for right now warred with lust for later, instant versus delayed gratification. “Bastard,” she panted as he gently sucked her earlobe, making it hard for her to think straight.

“Believe me,” he growled lowly. “It’s just as hard for me to stop, too. There’s nothing I want more right now than to rip your clothes off and take you. But—“

His words sent an intense flare of heat through her and she tangled her fingers in his hair once again and pulled his lips in for another fiery kiss, cutting off his sentence. She moaned against his mouth and he drank it in, devouring the cry and her mouth alike as he plainly battled internally for control of the situation. All he needed was one more little push…

“Damn it, Jaesa,” he hissed in a momentary break. “You’re not making this easy.”

She ran her tongue along the edge of his bottom lip enticingly, diabolically pleased at his choice of wording. “No, I make things _very hard_.”

His body trembled as he pulled his face away with a punctuated muttered expletive. She grinned. _Now who has control?_ Reaching one hand around to cup his jaw, she gently guided his lips back to hers, confident in her ability to keep him sufficiently distracted. The next kiss was wild and full of need, but reigned in, as if he were still not giving up the struggle for control. Shivers ran through her body when she thought about how it might feel when he finally let go. The movement seemed to excite Khryden, making him lose his internal battle a little bit more, and he growled, bearing down on her with more weight and kissing her harshly.

“My lord? Quinn said you were not answering your holocom and he was getting worr—Oh, sithspit!”

Khryden jerked his head up, seeing Vette standing frozen in the doorway with a hand clapped over her mouth. He loosed a full strength leave-us-alone-or-die-a-painful-death glare in her direction and she gave a very high pitched yelp and sprinted away. The storm cloud hovered over his face as he turned back to Jaesa, who giggled as soon as she saw it.

“Well, that broke the mood—again.” She snorted. “Honestly, when can we have any alone time without people interrupting us?”

He dropped a kiss on the tip of her nose. “Soon, I hope. For now, I should go see what Quinn wants.”

Jaesa groaned as he peeled himself away from her and offered her a hand up. She grasped it reluctantly, gasping as he pulled her up with enough force to fling her to her feet. Catching her in his arms, he claimed her mouth one last time.

“Soon,” he promised, his tone guttural. “I’m not finished with you yet.”

She returned the kiss fervently. “Soon,” she reluctantly agreed.

He released her and went to go pull on his shirt from where it was discarded in a corner. Gathering the rest of his things, he raised a hand to trace her jaw lightly with a finger. “I’m going to take a very cold shower. Vaiken Spacedock should be close. You should do the same while you have time since you’ll be accompanying me as we go pick up our lightsaber components and a few other things.”

Khryden’s mouth twitched as she grinned, then he left her alone, breathless and stunned with everything that had just happened. She felt like she needed several years just to process everything, but Vette would be waiting in the crew’s quarters for her as soon as she got there. And since the shower was attached to the quarters, there was no way for her to avoid the inevitable confrontation just a little bit longer. Dragging her feet, she picked up the discarded practice blades and replaced them in their rack, then ran her fingers through her hair, smoothing what she could feel without a mirror, and pulled up her hood. It would have to do until she could get to the shower.

As expected, Vette ambushed her as soon as she stepped through the door to the crew’s quarters. The Twi’lek bounced up out of her seat and flung her arms wide open in a ‘well?’ gesture. Jaesa merely raised an eyebrow and began to gather her shower things.

“Come on, Jaesa! What the kriff happened? You can’t just leave me hanging like this! You two leave for Voss and you’re all angry, then I see you two sucking face in the cargo hold not two minutes ago! What changed?”

Jaesa shrugged, not completely sure of it herself. “We talked. Cleared up a few things.”

Vette folded her arms, looking exasperated. “And?!”

Jaesa repeated the gesture. “We’re trying again.” She finished gathering her things and escaped into the shower.

As soon as Jaesa closed the door, Vette jumped around ecstatically, pumping her arms and grooving silently. Her match was safe!

\--=+=--

Meanwhile, Khryden poked his head into the cockpit, awarding Quinn a poisonous glare. “What is so important that you couldn’t wait to tell me?”

Quinn turned, taking one look at his lord’s stormy face, and blanched. “Ah, apologies, my lord.” He gave a small, deferential bow. “I only wished to informed you that we are about to arrive at Vaiken Spacedock. Then when you did not answer your holocom, I feared you to be weakened from the healing you received on Voss. So I sent Vette to investigate, my lord.”

Khryden shut his eyes briefly, struggling to keep his annoyance under control. “Next time, _don’t_. If I do not answer right away, especially if I’m on the ship, then I am busy. I will answer when I am ready.”

Quinn snapped his mouth shut as his lord ducked out of the doorway and stalked quickly into his quarters, heading for the refresher.

\--=+=--

Walking through crowds of spacers and Imperial officers on Vaiken Spacedock reminded Jaesa of her last visit, back when she was newly apprenticed, and recently disillusioned. Things hadn’t changed much since then; she noticed a few new venders but the layout was the same.

Though she lacked a lightsaber displaying her status, the robes and the fact that she followed a Sith led everyone, or most everyone, to give her a wide berth. With Khryden effectively distracted by modifications and enhancements in one booth. Jaesa drifted off, content with just strolling around the station while he worried about statistics. She enjoyed the atmosphere of Vaiken intensely. The bustling of subordinate people all around her gave her the feeling of time travel, as if she were moving slower than everyone else. Here on the space station were also those unafraid vendors willing to sell wares to Sith. Some stood dispassionately, content with letting their customers come to them, while others hawked their goods mercilessly, hoping to rope in a rich Imperial officer. She finished a lap around the outer ring of Vaiken, and, seeing Khryden still locked in debate with the modifications seller, angled her path to the cantina on the inner ring. With as much as he liked to haggle, she would have time for a drink before he and the seller settled on a price.

The cantina was practically empty compared to the rest of the station and Jaesa had no trouble finding an out of the way table after she ordered her drink. Letting her hood dip down to cover her eyes, she slowly reached out with her power so as to not overwhelm her senses. Jaesa had gotten better at controlling what direction her power went in, as well as the volume of people it passed. Had she been at the same level as her last visit, she would have quickly been overcome by sheer numbers as everyone’s true purpose began to flood her brain. Disciplined as she was now, it was thankfully no trouble.

There was a man who lied to his wife in order to get her an anniversary present, an Imperial officer who remained stubbornly stuck on his old modifications even though everyone else in his unit had upgraded, a lesser Sith looking for a Twi’lek slave although she wouldn’t admit it, three idiots looking to snatch a poor girl wearing purple robes from the cantina to kidnap and sell at a slave auction…

Her eyes popped open. What?!

A hand descended over her mouth and iron grips pinned her arms to her sides, sending a spike of panic shooting through her. But she paused, waiting for them to speak so she knew she had the right idiots.

“See?” the one holding her grunted. “No problem. The bitch knows her place already. Let’s knock her out and get her to the hangar.”

Her eyes widened and she struggled ineffectively against the restraining arms. Desperately, she sank her teeth into the hand covering her mouth, ripping out a chunk of flesh.

The man yowled and released her automatically, pushing her against the back wall. She caught herself with both hands and was thus unprepared to dodge the fist rocketing towards her jaw. Unable to regain her balance, Jaesa slammed her head against the wall prompting the world to flare brightly and making her lose her grip and inciting a burst of anger. Pain flared as his fist made contact, zinging through her Force bond and alerting Khryden immediately.

_Jaesa?_ His mental voice was tinged with panic.

_I’m fine_ , she replied automatically. _No injuries, just a bruise. I can handle this._

Would he let her? She held her breath as two beats of silence passed.

_All right_ , he acquiesced reluctantly. _I’m watching from above. Let me know if you want me to intervene._

She let out a relieved sigh. _Thank you, Khryden_.

“You bitch!” The first man hissed, cradling his injured hand.

“Look, come quietly and we won't hurt you,” the second man demanded.

Jaesa allowed her dark side power to flare, her irises turning blood red. “How about you walk away right now and I won't rip you apart for touching me?”

The injured man snarled at her and the second man shook his head regretfully. But the third man saw her crimson eyes and blanched, taking a step back. “Do what you want, guys, but I ain't messing with no Sith.”

The second man swung around. “Sith? What are you talking about? She doesn't have a lightsaber, she's no Sith!”

The third man started backing away. “Aw, hell no. I know a Sith when I see one. Them red eyes are a dead giveaway, lightsaber or no. I like being alive, thank you very much.” He spun, sprinting away and Jaesa let him go.

“She isn't Sith--” the first man turned back around and was cut off by an invisible hand clamped around his throat. His body was raised off the ground, feet flailing. The first man tried to turn and flee, but a second force constricted his throat, hauling him up in the air next to his partner and making him forget all about his injured hand as he quickly realized he couldn't breathe. She laughed mockingly. “Silly boys. Sith don’t need lightsabers to defend themselves.”

Jaesa watched with convoluted excitement as their faces turned red then blue in gradual succession. She drank in their strangled gasps, reveling in their fear. Their struggles finally attracted the attention of space station security and a couple of officers ran over, hesitating as they appraised the situation, Sith, twitching victims, and all.

The lead Imperial officer stepped forward hesitantly. “Ah, my lord?”

Jaesa turned to him, not breaking her Force grips. “Yes?” she asked sweetly.

The officer shifted uncomfortably. “Were these men...bothering you?”

“Why, yes, officer, they were. Or rather, they weren't until they attacked me and I was forced to defend myself.”

“They attacked you?” The officer glanced at the two struggling beefy men, who pleaded for help with bulging eyes. The Imperial swallowed. “Well then, they're within your rights to sentence, my lord. I can arrest them, or you can, ah, take care of them yourself.”

“Lovely! I was looking forward to this.” Jaesa grinned savagely and jerked her wrists, simultaneously snapping both of the men’s necks. “To be completely honest, I was going to do it anyway, but knowing you weren't going to interfere made it that much sweeter.”

She released her hold and the bodies fell to the floor, slumping at the officer’s feet. The man looked vaguely queasy, but he turned to the soldiers behind him and ordered one of them to clean up the mess.

_You can come down now_ , Jaesa called, wiping her hands together _. I think I'm done here._

Khryden appeared within a matter of seconds, affecting a concerned expression as he stalked towards them in full Sith glory, cape billowing behind him and lightsaber in plain sight on his belt. The Imperial officer straightened noticeably, snapping a salute as Khryden approached.

“Apprentice,” he called as he neared. “What is this? I told you to go get a drink, not kill worms.”

Formally, she bowed. “Apologies, master. The worms were asking for it.”

He reached forward, catching her chin and tilting her head to the side to examine the bruise blossoming on her cheek. Heat curled in her belly at his soft touch, but he let go way too soon and nodded. “Very well. Self-defense is authorized on Vaiken, so I trust you defended yourself well?”

She allowed the bloodthirsty smile to make a reappearance on her face. “Absolutely, master.”

Khryden turned to the Imperial officer, derision slightly coloring his tone. “If there is nothing else, my apprentice and I will return to our business.”

The officer bowed. “No, my lord. Everything is accounted for.”

“Well then. Apprentice?” He spun on his heel, oppressive presence not lessening for a moment and she followed him after offering the Imperial a smirking smile.

She caught up to him as he paused outside an elevator. Laying a hand on his arm, she grinned as he glanced at her. _Thank you_.

He offered a small smile in return. _You're welcome. Although I nearly lost it when they hit you_.

_I felt it_. She squeezed his arm and dropped her hand. _Well, is there anything else we need to get?_

_Ah, I was going to ask you. My lightsaber component order is in, but we also have access to the Galactic Trade Network here. Among Sith, some like buying their hilts through the Network, but others prefer to make their own with the Force so it's more like a part of them instead of just a tool. I like making my own, so I need to go pick up my components, but you have the option. You can either choose one from the Network, or come with me to pick up the components I ordered for you._

_Hmm_. She weighed her options. _You said you prefer to make your own?_

_I do_. He hesitated. _I learned that the hard way during my apprenticeship. Someone tampered with the new hilt I ordered when my one from Korriban broke. Nearly got me killed when I tried to use it immediately. But besides that experience, I've heard good things about the Trade Network. Some good designs and good craftsmanship. Just take every ‘too good to be true’ deal with a grain of salt_.

She shook her head. _Nope, you've convinced me. Besides, I made my first hilt myself, so I have some practice. I'm confident I can make it functional, if not pretty. It’ll be good practice._

They picked up the components without trouble and then dropped by a lightsaber crystal vender displaying a rainbow of colors.

“Welcome to Korriban Krystals, my lords, can I help you find anything? A red crystal probably?” The obviously bored attendant yawned.

Khryden raised an eyebrow. “Actually, we're looking for a purple crystal.”

The vendor perked up, grabbing a locked case from behind her and turning the combination swiftly. “Very good, my lords! Always a pleasure to serve the more innovative of the Sith population! Take a look at these. See anything you like?”

Jaesa leaned forward, examining the crystals. “Why is that one pink inside?”

The attendant grinned widely. “Because we only have the best at Korriban Krystals, and we get our mechandise at many different locations. Each crystal has an outline color and a core color. Most crystals have a white core, and they're the most common. Others have black cores, or different colored core. That one there had a pink core and a purple outline. The one next to it has a black webbing inside, displaying its black core and purple outline. On the other side is a purple outline crystal with a plain white core, and next to that is the amethyst, a slightly lighter color, and next to that is the soft purple, a darker color. If you'd like to test any of them, I have a holographic scanning system that can preview what the crystal would look like in your hilt.”

Jaesa blinked, eyes on the crystals. She wanted one that spoke to her and that paralleled her personality and spoke to her. The black crystal was out, as was the pink core. Extending her hand, she hovered her palm over the last three one at a time while in tune with the Force. Khryden and the vendor watched silently as she tested each crystal, both well aware that this was a private and important selection.

Feeling a humming emit from the one beneath her palm that faded whenever she moved away, Jaesa opened her eyes, fingers brushing the space between two crystals. She frowned, glancing up at the vendor. “Is there another crystal in the shelf below? I can feel it humming.”

The attendant winced. “Ah, well, yes, but--”

“Show me,” Jaesa interrupted.

The woman nodded reluctantly and pulled a much smaller box from below the counter, inputting the combination, and sliding the open box towards Jaesa. “This one is what we call the derelict purple crystal. It's the last one in stock and we were trying to avoid selling it because of its strange aura…”

“I want it.” Jaesa couldn't explain the intense connection she felt with the derelict crystal, but it was there, tangible and humming.

_Are you sure?_ Khryden murmured. _This is the one you felt?_

_Positive_ , Jaesa affirmed.

“We'll take it,” he said to the vendor. “Thank you for your assistance.”

The attendant opened her mouth as if to protest, but twin Sith-patented glares cut her off. Quickly, she smiled and bowed deferentially. “Of course, my lords. Let me wrap it up for you.”

\--=+=--

Settling in front of the bubbling kolto tank in her meditation room, Jaesa pulled various components from her bag and placed them before her. She retrieved the crystal and let the wrapping fall away, eyes lighting up excitedly. Wrapping her legs in a crossed position, she allowed her eyelids to slide shut and reached for the Force.

Jaesa regulated her breathing and summoned forth the memories of pain and anger that surrounded the destruction of her previous lightsaber. Her Jedi saber had been made with calm serenity and had served her well, but it was no longer a representation of who she was. Though calm, she used passion to fuel herself. And her new dualsaber would be the representation of her passion.

The pieces called out to her through the Force and she responded, picking and choosing those that called the loudest. She summoned forth her Force bond in all its intensity, using it to weld bits together. The hilt slowly began to take shape in the air. Calling up memories of the unbridled rage at seeing Master Karr fall that helped along her own fall, she tempered them with the feelings of belonging and confidence. A few more pieces of the hilt snapped together. Remembering her time as an apprentice under Khryden, she used knowledge to concentrate her feelings of trust and loyalty. The grip wrapped itself around the structure, leaving holes open on both ends. Finally, summoning forth her passion and love, Jaesa used the Force to pluck her derelict crystal from the ground and slid it in place, locking the mechanism around it and snapping in the last few pieces of the outer hilt.

Before breaking from her trance, Jaesa tested the security of each component, making sure it was completely glued together and working as intended. Opening her eyes slowly, she made the hilt spin in the air and examined it for visual deficiencies, then used the Force to activate the switch. Twin bright purple beams shot from either side, casting a light violet glow over her face. Raising her hand, Jaesa called to her weapon, testing her knowledge of its signature in her Force sight.

The slender silver and black hilt was imprinted with delicate scrollwork, a product of her Force signature and emotions on the metal. The swirls were interspersed with bolts of arcing lightning, portraying a desire for knowledge amidst a desire for power. Or so she liked to think, Jaesa thought, smirking. Truthfully, it was pretty and she enjoyed the tactile feeling underneath her fingertips. The smoothness of the black grip directly contradicted the rough patterns of the lightning and scrollwork. Claw-like pieces of metal protected either base of her blade, the points sharp.

It was quite a beautiful piece of work that glittered in the faint violet light. The hilt landed in her hand and she flicked the hidden switch, extinguishing the blade and watched as the purple light faded.

Jaesa stood and weighed the hilt in her hand, testing its balance. Spinning it in her palm, she snapped her fingers shut on the grip and activated it smoothly. A grin came over her face as her saber came to life, humming comfortingly. She felt like she could take on the world.

_Watch out, Baras_ , she thought grimly, swinging her saber through the air and listening to its ominous hum. _We're coming for you_.

\--=+=--

Jaesa idly ran a finger over her lightsaber hilt as Servants One and Two talked, half tuning them out as they briefed the Wrath on the Corellia situation. If it was as bad as it sounded, she and Khryden would have their work cut out for them. The corner of her mouth twitched into a frown. Assassins after Darth Vowrawn? An increasing Republic offensive? It would prove to be a challenging mission. But then again, the more challenging, the better.

“Good luck, Wrath.” The Emperor’s Hand signed off and vanished from the holoterminal.

As Khryden turned and prepared to give orders, Quinn stepped forward, locking his hands behind his back and raising his chin respectfully. “My lord, there is one problem that I have run into. Corellia’s airspace has been restricted by Darth Baras using a new type of sensor net. Only ships with specific access codes are allowed to dock at the space station, otherwise the Imperial fleet will destroy it.” Quinn paused for emphasis.

Khryden scratched his chin. “Truly? Then we should prioritize this.”

“However, there is a deactivated Imperial dreadnaught in Voss space and I believe it holds the codes we need. I have previous experience aboard a ship like that. I can lead you straight to the terminals.”

Khryden frowned for a moment, then shook his head. “No, Quinn, I want you to stay with the ship. I need you to inventory the med bay before we touch down on Corellia’s surface in case we have need of it. Jaesa, I want you to accompany me. There are some things I’d like to discuss with you regarding the next step in your training as well as our plan for Corellia.”

“My lord, that won’t be necessary,” Quinn intervened quickly. “It should be a quick stop. The dreadnaught is abandoned and it shouldn’t take too long to access its codes since I know where the terminals are. I can take inventory immediately when we return.”

The Wrath’s eyes flashed and his voice lowered dangerously. “Are you defying a direct order, Captain?”

Quinn snapped to attention, his spine ramrod straight. “No, my lord, I wouldn’t dream of it. It was merely a suggestion.”

Khryden gave a sharp nod. “Set course for the dreadnaught. You will stay here. As soon as we dock, Jaesa and I will get the codes and then we’ll set off for Corellia.”

\--=+=--

The abandoned Imperial dreadnaught came into view through the black maw of space. Its hulking black form floated listlessly amongst the dark space, devoid of stars. Though she wasn’t expecting trouble, Jaesa dressed for battle anyway, clipping her lightsaber to her belt and refilling her transportable med kit. Docking at the dreadnaught’s entrance made the ship shudder and Jaesa finished in her preparations before going to meet Khryden by the door. The moment they stepped through the airlock, however, a parallel feeling of apprehension and discomfort swamped them. They exchanged anxious glances, but continued on.

Khryden and Jaesa made their way through the abandoned ship, their shared unease increasing with every step. The Force could only talk to them so much, and it had already made it clear that there was something wrong with this situation. Sure, they had expected it to be abandoned, but it was more a feeling in the air that made the hair on the back of Jaesa's neck stand up. They stayed quiet, an unspoken agreement rooted in the cloistered feeling of unease.

Khryden turned the corner, glancing around for traps while she hovered a few paces behind him watching their backs, and he froze, a sudden spike of surprise and anger shooting through their bond. He slowly turned the corner, fury tamed for the moment.

_Khryden?_ Jaesa asked. _What—?_

His answer was a flash of memories. Of the Voss ghost Madaga-Ru appearing to him in the spaceport when she had gone ahead to ready the ship. Of the ghost thanking him for the deed done and offering a piece of advice in return. Of the sudden rush of dread and apprehension when the betrayal was prophesied.

Her eyes dug into the back of his head as he strode ahead, hands drifting towards his saber hilts. _Who—?_

She rounded the corner and was struck by a similar combination of surprise and anger. Standing in parade rest in the middle of the room, looking pale but confident, was Malavai Quinn.

Her hands moved automatically for her saberstaff, but Khryden held up a hand.

_I want to hear what he has to say_ , he commanded. _Do not attack until I do._

She growled softly, but backed down and froze her hand’s movement, resting her fingers lightly on her hilt instead.

“Quinn.” Khryden’s voice was ice. “What are you doing here? I told you to wait on the ship. You just disobeyed a direct order.”

Quinn clenched his jaw, the tiny movement not escaping Jaesa’s hawk-like glare. “I could not leave you to this fate without showing the respct of being able to witness it.” He bowed his head. “Regretfully, my lord, in disobeying you, I follow higher orders given to me.”

“Explain.” There was a stunning amount of coldness packed into that one word.

“It pains me, but this entire scenario was a ruse. There was no blockade, and no transmission needed to dock on Corellia. It was all a plan to lure you here. Baras is my true master. And he has commanded me to kill you.”

Rage bubbled up her chest, spilling out of her lips. “Traitor.”

Khryden’s wintry tone made the warning clear. “Think this through, Quinn. Are you sure you want to do this to yourself?”

Quinn flinched ever so slightly. “I regret that it has come to this, my lord. But you know me. I never act without consideration.” His voice steadied. “Baras saved my career. And he’ll save the Empire.”

Quinn began to pace, plainly agitated. “I didn’t want to choose between the two of you, but he’s forced my hand.” He swallowed. “I must side with him.”

A wave of cold fury swamped Jaesa. How dare he. How _dare_ he! She wanted the pleasure of ripping his heart from his chest more than she had wanted someone dead ever before. Struggling to keep a unruffled, calm façade going, she strove to sound cool and disconnected, even though Khryden could feel her pulsing anger through the bond. “This kind of intrigue makes my spine tingle. I’d love to kill a traitor.”

Quinn turned, finally facing them head on. “Jaesa, you have no idea how long I’ve held my breath, hoping you wouldn’t use your power on me. But no matter. Baras has specifically expressed that I should extend his welcoming hand to you and relay the offer to join us.”

His words, so utterly ridiculous, made her laugh. “Are you kidding me? I may sense nothing but confidence within you, but…” She snickered. “You’re funny, Quinn.”

The captain didn’t move, his face deadly serious. “Your powers will be a great benefit when Baras has turned you to him, Jaesa. For now, I can’t have you disrupting my calculations.”

The laughter died on her lips as Quinn lifted a small device and pressed a button, loosing waves of blue energy. The moment the waves hit her, it was like being hit by a herd of stampeding nerf, knocking the breath from her lungs. The waves entered her brain, echoing painfully and making her moan and clutch her head. She was vaguely aware of Khryden demanding to know if she was ok, first mentally, then out loud when she didn’t respond. The device’s emissions stole the will to stand from her limbs and she collapsed painfully on the floor, unable to move but still very conscious. The vibrations faded from her brain as she lay there, cheek pressed against the cool floor. Her hearing phased back in, but her muscles still remained unresponsive.

“Jaesa?” Khryden knelt next to her head, checking her pulse quickly. Their bond was muted, but she could clearly sense the rush of relief as he felt the erratic beating of her heart underneath his gloved fingertips. He lowered his voice to a whisper. “Just stay calm. I’ll deal with Quinn then come back to help you.”

Quinn cleared his throat. “Baras and I have been planning this for some time, my lord. You’ll have to face this fight alone.”

Khryden slowly rose to his feet, tightly controlled anger pulsing with every heartbeat. “You’re a fool, Quinn. I really thought you were smarter than this.”

“I’ll show you how smart I am,” Quinn hissed. “After all this time observing you in battle, I have exhaustively noted your strengths and weaknesses.” As if on cue, the door behind Quinn opened to reveal two gleaming war droids. “These droids have been programmed specifically to combat you. I calculate a near zero percent chance of their failure.”

The droids advanced, their metal feet made ominous clacking sounds that echoed throughout the room as Khryden unclipped both lightsabers from his belt. He activated them, twin fiery orange blades flaring aggressively to life. “You have made your last mistake, Quinn,” he snarled, the dark side lending a fear-inducing tone to his voice.

To his credit, Quinn didn’t flinch. “I’m sorry it’s come to this, my lord.”

Without another word, Khryden leapt, lightsabers humming.

Jaesa wanted to scream. Paralyzed on the floor was not where she wanted to be! She needed to be at Khryden’s side, defending his back! She strained, breath coming faster with the effort, but she remained stubbornly stuck to the floor. Drawing on the dark side, she fueled her limbs with strength and tried again, but still there was no response. Maybe there wasn’t anything wrong with her muscles, maybe the blockage was in her brain. The device must have been a neural inhibiter aligned with only her brainwaves! Redoubling her efforts, Jaesa strained against the inhibitor. She would not let this defeat her! She needed to help Khryden!

Her eyes flicked upwards. The Wrath was a blur, seamlessly flowing between the two war droids while scoring their shells with burns. Concentrating strikes on places he’d already hit, each attack dug further and further into the metal armor, burning through layer after layer of protection. But it took time, and each spare second allowed the war droids to counterattack. Each time blaster bolts were blocked by lightsabers, Jaesa flinched internally and struggled even harder against the nerual inhibitor. She felt it keenly now, the imaginary restraining band that encircled her brain, stemming all movement. The more she fought against the inhibitor’s neural waves, the more a familiar pulsing fury filtered into her head. _Khryden_. She grabbed onto that rage like a lifeline, anchoring herself. _Let me go. I need to help him. My place is by his side and nowhere else_. Thrashing her limbs, or trying to, Jaesa thought she felt her fingers twitch. Renewed determination swelled within her.

_I love him. I can’t let this conquer me. Never before have I felt this way for someone, but now that I have, I can’t see a way out and I don’t want one. I need to show my devotion. I need to show him that I want what we have to last forever. I want forever. I want him to be mine and only mine. And to do that, I need to break out of this inhibitor! Khryden needs me and this and Quinn are the only two things standing in my way_. Icy anger slid over her at her thought of the traitor. _I wonder who will get to him first._

Jaesa wanted nothing more than to make Quinn scream and beg for mercy due to the betrayal he wrought. He had deceived them, but more importantly, had prevented her from helping Khryden. And that was unacceptable. Betrayal was one thing, but it was entirely another when the betrayer refused to let her fight at her lover’s side. And for that, the captain would _pay_.

Gathering her strength, she mentally bodyslammed the inhibitor’s waves repeatedly. _I can’t give up_ , she thought, attempts at freedom interspersed with her words. _I—need—to—help—Khryden!_ Throwing herself recklessly at the restraints, Jaesa felt them give the slightest bit. Mentally crowing her achievement, she thrashed with even more vigor, feeling the restraints loosen more with each passing second.

Meanwhile, the Wrath jammed both of his lightsabers through the second droid, ignoring the blaster bolt that grazed his side in its last ditch attempt to follow its programming. Form glowing red with unspent fury, he turned on Quinn. The captain was sweating, plainly recognizing his fatal mistake. Khryden leapt to him, buffeted by the Force, and brought his lightsabers down in a devastating arc, one hilt making contact with the delicate bones in Quinn’s wrist and hand that held his gun, and the other blade scoring a deep wound across his side. Dropping his gun, Quinn yelped and fell to his knees, pressing his shattered wrist against the cauterized gash. His body was speckled with burns from deflected blaster bolts, but none as serious as his newest acquisition.

Khryden raised his hand, summoning Quinn’s gun to hover in the air in front of him and sliced it in two with a single brutal slash. The captain flinched as the pieces hit the ground in front of him, his last defense now a smoking ruin.

“Move one inch,” the Emperor’s Wrath hissed, “and I will make your death as painful as possible.”

Khryden spun, cape snapping, and knelt next to Jaesa. She was slowly sitting up, holding her head in both hands as the world spun around her. “Are you ok?”

Jaesa drew upon his nearness, settling her stomach and chasing away the last vestiges of the neural inhibitor’s restraining waves. “I think so.”

No, she was not ok. She did not feel ok. Her muscles felt like jelly and a headache was beginning to pound in her brain, and that wasn’t mentioning the emotions churning inside of her. But she put on a brave face and strove to radiate reassuring vibes.

He rose to his feet and offered her a hand, which she gratefully accepted. The dizzyness returned for a moment as the blood rushed from her head, but faded after a moment and she joined Khryden at her place by his side as he stared down at Quinn, face unreadable. Jaesa knew what he was feeling, though. Below the calm exterior was a raging inferno of fury that was so strong, even the Force-blind like Quinn could feel it.

Tasting the sharp scent of fear in the air, Jaesa stepped forward, her hand on her hilt. _Khryden. May I…_

_No_. The denial rang loud and clear through their bond and she jolted to a stop, twisting around to look at him.

The Wrath’s eyes flashed dangerously. _He is mine._

Jaesa had never before witnessed such dark fury in his voice. Though she wanted to ignore the order and at least draw some of the traitor’s blood, his tone stopped her cold in her tracks. Quinn looked defeated, his terrified gaze flicking between the two Sith as Jaesa seemed to reluctantly respond to a telepathic order. She retreated to a step behind Khryden, annoyed but just watching for now.

“I should have known,” the traitor hissed, evidently deciding to break the impass with brazen hindsight. “I thought for sure I’d programmemd the perfect killing machines for you. I was painstakingly precise.”

“Then you’ve proven your ineptitude,” the Wrath said, his voice harder than durasteel. “After all this time, and you still can’t find one weakness to exploit? I’m disappointed in you, Malavai Quinn.”

The kneeling captain flinched. “I…I’m sorry, my lord, for failing you. But…I couldn’t hit you the one place where I knew it would hurt. Baras ordered your death, not Jaesa’s.”

Stunned, she put she pieces together. In his own way, Quinn had stayed loyal after all. He knew droids were no match for Khryden, but he programmed them anyway and put himself in the line of fire. That way he was fulfilling his orders from Baras but at the same time made sure that there were no outside elements that might throw a wrench in his planning. Human assassins were too hard to control compared to droids, who only listened to their programming. It was the perfect cover to look like he tried without really trying at all. As much as Jaesa despised him for what he had done, she had to admit that it was clever.

“I have betrayed you.” The captain swallowed, facing his imminent demise. “Conspired with your most hated enemy. I know it is meaningless to express my deep regret.” He bowed his head. “I don’t expect your mercy.”

Those words triggered Khryden and his control snapped. It was like a dam burst and a flood of dark side power detonated, sending shockwaves throughout the room. “How dare you threaten Jaesa!” His aura of fury flared to life, surrounding his body with a crimson glow and his golden eyes blazed blood red. “Youu will pay! It is useless to defy me!” He flung out a hand, Force-pushing Quinn away and slamming his body against the wall. Jaesa was certain she heard at least three bones crack on impact. Quinn fell to the ground with a grunt of pain and Khryden strode forward menacingly, eyes glowing bright crimson. The captain struggled to get up onto his feet when the Emperor’s Wrath suddenly stood in front of him, hand extended. An invisible vice-like grip closed over Quinn’s throat and he was raised, choking and struggling, into the air.

Never before had Jaesa seen Khryden completely lose control like this. He was always the guarded one, telling her to control her power before it lashed out at everyone around her, but now there was no holding him back. Jaesa didn’t know if she could stop him in this state even if she wanted to. Raw power whipped around him like a shield, leaking a terrifying aura that was no doubt wreaking havoc on Quinn’s mind. But his face was set in a concentrated expression and there was fire in his eyes.

He was struggling with himself, Jaesa was sure of it. His jaw clenched and unclenched rhythmically and something battled in his eyes. The internal struggle was tearing him apart and with each passing second, the probability of Quinn's survival decreased. She allowed herself a cruel smile as she witnessed Khryden’s fingers twitch. Just a little bit more movement and the traitor would get what he deserved: a snapped neck.

The moment she felt his decision through their bond, her jaw dropped. Khryden let out a strained growl and abruptly dropped his hand. Quinn slumped to the ground, unconscious and barely breathing, but the Wrath made no attempt to finish the job as he struggled to regain his control.

“Are you kidding me?”

The flare of rage that burst from her was too intense for her to handle. Her form exploded with dark side energy, a fiery aura that reflected the deep fury in her eyes. She strode forward on a warpath, whipping out her lightsaber with the intent on beheading the traitor right then and there. Until a heavy hand landed on her shoulder, physically restraining her from reaching her goal. Jaesa spun with a growl, coming face to face with Khryden.

_Control, Jaesa_ , he reminded her, mindful of the fury pulsing just below her surface, so similar to his own.

“Let me kill him!” Her voice was so gutteral with barely restrained anger that she nearly didn’t recognize it at first.

His fingers dug into her shoulder painfully. _He is mine to kill. He betrayed_ me _. Understand?_

She felt her lips draw back in a snarl as she fought to gain some semblence of restraint. _If you don’t, then I will_. Freeing her shoulder from his grip with a jerk, she glared at him defiantly before once again stepping submissively backwards.

The Wrath returned his blistering gaze to Quinn. _He was told by Baras to kill me, even though he knew he had no chance. He knew that, and Baras knew it too._

_So?_ Jaesa snarled.

Thr Wrath stepped forward, using the toe of his boot to hook under the fallen captain’s shoulder and rolling him onto his back. Seeing the weak fluttering beat of his pulse in his neck, Khryden glanced to Jaesa. _Baras is becoming desperate. He threw his deeply embedded spy directly into my path, knowing full well that it would not slow me down and I would have no choice but to kill him. For his part, Quinn knew going after you was a way to weaken me, but he didn’t. He had ample opportunity, but he never took advantage of it._ His fevered eyes searched hers, their twin gazes barely restraining all-consuming fury. _That tells me he still has some shred of loyalty left in him. He’s not completely worthless. Not yet. There is still some value in keeping him alive. And when Baras sees his spy turned to our side, I will derive_ much _pleasure from it. I want to throw it in his face the next time I see him. The great Darth Baras, master of the spy network, failed at killing his own spy because he no longer has me to do his dirty work for him_

_You would keep a traitor alive just to shove it in Baras’ face?_ She calmed somewhat, feeling his confidence in his decision, but her crimson eyes fervently searched his golden ones for any indidcation of hesitancy. She bit back her next angry words with a growl and let the fiery aura surrounding her die down, displaying her reluctant assent _. Fine. But if he steps one toe out of line, nothing in the galaxy will save him._

Khryden’s response was cut off by a groan from the downed traitor who was coming back to consciounesss. He blinked his eyes open slowly then forced himself to stand, doubled over against the pain.

“My lord.” Quinn’s voice grated on his raw throat. “Such mercy. I can honestly say I did not expect this from you.”

One glance from his lord’s face to Jaesa’s told him the entire story. The female Sith’s face was murderous, but luckily for Quinn, her master’s presence seemed to keep her in check. For now. Quinn swallowed, bruised throat rasping painfully. Whether that would change the moment they were out of Lord Khryden’s sight, well, that was another story. One that Quinn wasn’t sure he’d survive.

The captain swallowed painfully. “Darth Baras would never forgive such a failure. If you permit me to stay in your charge, I swear my dedication will be unwavering. Please, my lord.”

_Jaesa? Is he telling the truth?_

She touched Quinn with her special power, grimacing when the feelings of overwhelming fear, terror, despair flooded her along with just a pinch of cautious optimism. For a split second, she debated lying  to Khryden, but discarded the idea immediately. Instead, she scoffed. _Unfortunately_.

The Emperor’s Wrath fixed Quinn with a pinning gaze, ignoring the pathetic plea. “You live only by my discretion. Luckily for you, you’re still somewhat useful. But your usefulness may deteriorate and my decision may change at any moment.” He jabbed a threatening finger in Quinn’s pale face. “Don’t give me a reason.”

The traitor nodded meekly and Khryden folded his arms, still focused on regaining his internal equilibrium. “This situation has delayed this long enough. Return to the ship, Quinn. Jaesa and I will join you shortly.”

“One thing, my lord. Do you plan on telling the rest of the crew as to what transpired?”

Khryden met Quinn’s hopeful eyes with steel. “For now, it goes unmentioned. I need a unified crew behind me when we land on Corellia and you’ll need to lead them. But be warned, Malavai Quinn. One order I don’t agree with, one movement that I don’t like, or one _thought_ about toeing the line and my wrath will be swift and unmerciful. There will be no third chances. Am I clear?”

“As crystal, my lord.” Quinn bowed stiffly despite his injuries. “I will meet you back aboard the ship.”

The moment the door slammed shut behind him, Khryden leaned back against the nearest wall shakily. His bloodlust ran rampant just below the surface and was screaming for him to kill something since he had denied himself the pleasure of slaughtering the traitor. Jaesa merely watched for a few minutes, letting it almost consume his thoughts entirely before sauntering over to him. As much as she would love to release him onto the ship in this state, it would no doubt be severely hazardous to everyone’s health. As in death for all. And Jaesa happened to like Vette and Pierce. They didn’t deserve murder just because her boyfriend couldn’t cope with denied passion. Quinn on the other hand…No. An order was an order no matter how much Jaesa wanted to twist her lightsaber into the traitor’s gut. 

_Patience_ , she reminded herself. _Sooner or later, Quinn will slip up and you’ll be justified in killing him_. Until then, however, it would be in her best interest to make sure Quinn got the message. But first she needed to leech off some of Khryden’s excess energy.

Jaesa grabbed his face with her palms on either side of his jaw, stepping close enough to pin him against the wall with her body, and pressed a dominating kiss to his lips. As always, the first touch stole her breath away, but she soldiered on, pushing him back against the wall. The world spun as she broke the kiss to make sure his complete attention was focused on her, ignoring her pounding heart. His eyes were swirling orbs of passion and bloodlust, one quickly giving way to the other. Warm breath graced her lips as he panted, using her perfectly timed distraction to focus on lust rather than murderous intent.

“Jaesa,” he forced out between puffs. “I don’t know if I can stop myself this time. You need to tell me _right now_ if you don’t want this.”

She leaned forward with a seductive smirk on her lips, the thrill in her stomach becoming harder and harder to overlook by the second. “What makes you think I don’t want this? I initiated the kiss in the cargo hold, if you remember. I’ve been _waiting_ for this to happen.”

In such close proximity to him, she witnessed the stab of pure desire as it lanced through his eyes and felt the possessive growl rumble through his chest. Without any delay, he bent down and scooped her up, one arm around her shoulders and the other hooked under her knees. She tossed one arm covetously around his neck allowing lustful heat to consume her whole as he carried her onto the ship. He paused in the threshold to shout an order to Vette to set course for Corellia, then swept them both into his bedroom.

The door shut quickly behind them, cutting off Jaesa’s flirtatious giggle.

\--=+=--

“Thank you.”

“Hmm? For what?”

Jaesa smiled up at him with pure happiness from her position leaning her cheek on his bare chest. Bed sheets tangled their bodies, just covering enough as the heady scent combination of sex and sweat laced the air and there was nothing in the galaxy that could dampen her spirits right now. “For being you.”

A responding grin came effortlessly to his face. It was so easy to relax and smile around her that he found himself letting go of his stone-faced façade more frequently in her presence. It was refreshing. “What about being me?”

She trailed a finger idly over his chest. “Your protectiveness. Don’t get me wrong, too much is too much, but…it’s nice to have someone looking out for you sometimes. I’m not used to it.” Biting her lip, she debated whether or not to ask the question hovering on the forefront of her mind.

Khryden captured her hand and interlaced their fingers. “Ask. I can sense you’re dying to interrogate me.”

She swatted his shoulder good-naturedly. “It’s more of a serious question, if you don’t mind.”

“What better time to discuss things of a serious nature?” He planted a kiss on her forehead. “Ask.”

“When we talked earlier, you mentioned having to think about another’s feelings being a new experience. What did you mean?”

He sighed, but squeezed her hand reassuringly. “I suppose I should give you some background, but you’re right, this needs to be said.

“When we got attacked by the bounty hunters, I panicked. I’m so used to having to be the strongest and having to protect those I care about, ever since I was young and playing with my brothers and sisters. It got reinforced during my enslavement, and again during my stay on Korriban. They show you can’t protect others unless you’re strong enough. The overseers make sure of that. That’s why friendships are so rare and when they do truly happen, the overseers like to pit them against one another. The strongest comes out on top, and the weaker get swept aside. If you wanted anyone to survive, you had to shield them. Keep them safe. I failed in protecting my siblings from slavers, and again when the bastards split us up. I hated it. I hated being helpless.” His fist clenched unknowingly in his lap for a second before it loosened and he sighed. “I was young. I didn’t care that much for the other slaves or anyone I met at the Academy, so I didn’t realize the depth to my overprotectiveness until now. I’m well aware that isn't an excuse, I only hope to explain why I am the way I am. I hadn’t found anyone I care about until now. I just need look at you, feel your presence, and I need to be there for you, to protect you, even at the expense of my own life.

“I have a confession to make.” He took a breath and ran his free hand roughly through his hair, betraying his nervousness. “It’s been that way for a while, but the moment you started flirting back and returning my affections, albeit slowly, I knew I had it bad and was in it for the long haul. I…I _care_ about you too much for this to be an on and off thing. On Nar Shaddaa, all I could see was that bounty hunter’s blaster shot heading straight for your heart and I knew I couldn’t let it hit, even if it meant taking the hit myself. I don’t know how much you heard me say while you were hovering on the brink of death on Voss, but blocking the Force bond between us tore a part of me open and made me feel hollow. Then when you nearly died in the Dark Heart, I felt more fear than I had ever felt before. Even though we fought and disagreed about some things, I knew if you died, a part of me would have died, too. I’ve never felt that way before with anyone. I…I…Damn it, Jaesa, I love you.”

He turned suddenly, tucking one arm underneath him and grabbing both her hands. He stared at their interlocking fingers for a second before raising his soulful gaze. “I promise, I’ll try to be better. To treat you with the respect and love you deserve. And…I’m sorry.”

Throughout his confession, Jaesa’s eyes were wide and her body still. She mirrored his movement automatically, turning her body into his as he grasped her hands. To say that she was stunned was an understatement, but she understood why he thought it was important to tell her this. Even though she was stuck on the three magical words and couldn’t process anything else.

She gathered her thoughts silently for a moment, knowing with certainty that it was her turn. “This relationship has to work both ways. I won’t blame you for your faults, if you won’t blame me for mine. All I ask is that you try. In exchange, I’ll try to be more considerate when volunteering myself for crazy suicidal plans that a certain Sith thinks up.”

Twin smiles lit their faces as they remembered.

“But joking aside, I have an apology to expound on as well.” She licked her lips, unused to speaking the wrong conclusions she drew on her own and admitting them to be mistaken. “I overreacted on Nar Shaddaa, in hindsight. It had been an emotional night and I was trying to prove that I was not helpless. That I could take care of myself. In doing so, I only succeeded in pushing you away and I’m sorry.” Jaesa leaned forward slightly. “I will try to be more careful, though. I know now that I have nothing to prove, to you, me, or anyone else, and this is the first time in my life when I can say that with full truthfulness and believe it. I couldn’t wait to get off Alderaan, then when the Jedi took me, it was always unfulfillable goals to be a stereotypical lobotomized pacifist.”

Though the air was serious, his lips twitched sardonically at her choice of words. She allowed a small smile in response, then continued. “I feel like I belong here and with our relationship strengthening us, I finally know my own power. And you helped me get here. I’d still be a Jedi without your interference. But now look at us.” She squeezed his hands. “I don’t want you sacrificing yourself for me because I value your life just as much as I value mine. I came to terms with my death in the halls of the Dark Heart.” A smile worked its way back onto her face. “And you tried to take my place despite the Voice of the Emperor ordering you to kill his vessel. You were willing to defy the Emperor for me.”

“I…suppose I was.”

“And afterwards, when you nearly died lending the strength to heal me?” Jaesa shook her head, unbelieving. “No one has ever done that for me. No one has ever gone to the lengths you have to keep us safe. That’s why I love you.” The words, finally spoken out loud, caused sparks to detonate throughout her entire body. The first time in her life she had felt such certainty, it had been standing over Master Karr’s body at Khryden’s side. The moment she watched the light leaving her Jedi teacher’s eyes, tinged by hypocritical darkness, she had felt the confidence that the decision she made was the right one, that she was meant to be Sith. The same sparks had exploded throughout her body when Khryden had spoken the words accepting her plea of apprenticeship moments later. This was the second time in her life. The second time that it felt _absolutely right_.  “I never want to let go of you again.”

A light shiver ran through him as he remembered Voss. “That was too close. I shudder to think what might have happened if the Shrine of Healing hadn’t been nearby. Or if you had bled out on the way. Or if Vana-Xo had denied you healing. I was almost certain I was going to lose you.”

She sensed something bouncing around in his head, but it was too fast for her to follow. His words caused an outpouring of affection and she smiled blissfully and snuggled into his chest. “You’ll never have to lose me again, love. I’m sticking with you.”

His arms tightened around her, his voice rough. “Voss and Nar Shaddaa has made me realize that I never want to let go of you again. Never again. I _never_ want to lose you again.” He paused and took a deep breath. “Jaesa…” He trailed off, wating for her confirmation which she readily gave.

“Yes?”

“Will you marry me?”

To say that she was stunned was an understatement. She was floored. Completely and utterly flabbergasted. And there was nothing she wanted more. They understood each other. They were perfectly compatible. She loved him, and he loved her. Disagreements would come and go, but passion was what made them Sith. And as long as she had him by her side, Jaesa felt like she could take on the world.

Taking her silence as hesitation, he pulled back, holding her at arm’s length and searching her eyes for some clue as to what she was thinking. “Marry me?” he repeated.

That broke the spell and instantly she was flooded with unbridled happiness. Her eyes welled up with tears as sparks ran the entire length of her body, making her nerve endings sing. She clapped a hand over her mouth, trying to prevent a joyous sob from escaping. “Yes, yes, _oh Force, yes_!”

A exuberant and slightly relieved smile struck his face and he pulled her into a tender kiss. Sparks flitted across her skin and forced her unquenchable smile to break the kiss. She pressed her forehead against his, basking in the indominable feeling of _right_. “We shared our minds, then our bodies, and now our spirits,” she murmured, half falling asleep. “We are one.”

He kissed her forehead lightly as she drifted off. “Sleep well, my love. Death and destruction await us on Corellia.”

\--=+=--

Jaesa woke mere hours later, her bladder protesting loudly. One glance at her lover— _fiancé_ , she reminded herself giddily—told her he was still asleep, his bare chest rising and falling rhythmically. Ducking out from under his arm, she made her way to his personal refresher and used it, airing her damp hands underneath the speed dryer. As happy as she felt right now, there was one thing that still grated on her. Slipping back into Khryden’s bedroom, she paused, identifying the perfectly offered situation before her. Khryden was asleep and Quinn was left unguarded. Khryden had specifically told her not to kill Quinn, but that didn’t mean she couldn’t rough him up. Or give him a little taste of her revenge.

Dressing quickly, she closed Khryden’s door as quietly as she could behind her. Padding with silent feet around the darkened ship, Jaesa eventually saw a light on in the medbay and redirected her path there. She touched the door control and they slid open to reveal a shirtless Quinn trying to wrap bandages around his cracked ribs with a cast on his shattered hand. He spun as the door disengaged and the blood drained from his face as he involuntarily backed away from her.

“My lord—?”

She sneered, pressing a single finger to her lips. Abruptly, Quinn fell silent, his entire body trembling. He knew why she was here.

“Silence, Captain,” she murmured. “If you make one sound, it’s over. Understand?”

He swallowed hard, his Adam’s apple bobbing, and performed a shaky salute. Fear and apprehension was rolling off of him in waves and Jaesa drank it in, using it to fuel her power.

“Good. Now be a good boy and don’t scream,” she whispered ruthlessly and extended a single hand. Purple Force lightning shot from her fingertip, arcing to Quinn’s body and causing it to seize while producing immense pain. The traitor clenched his jaw  to stop the cries from leaving his body, eyes watering as the agony didn’t stop. Just when he thought he’d had all that he could handle and his military discipline was just about to crack, Jaesa cut off the stream of lightning and allowed Quinn to slump to the floor, boneless and twitching.

Her lips twisted into a cruel smile as she jolted his body with fresh sparks, making him writhe and shake on the floor. She was hungry for fear. And each spike from Quinn tasted _delicious_. She was so caught up in the thrilling taste of pure fear and pain that she nearly stopped the traitor’s heart. With a soft swear, she cut herself off abruptly and waited until he regained consciousness.

Sensing him return to the present, she squatting down next to his head, her voice soft and dangerous. “You’re lucky I’m in a good mood, Quinn. Or you might’ve not survived the night. No, this is only a warning. Something to remember if you _ever_ think about pulling a stunt like that again. Next time, it’ll be a lot worse. I promise.”

With that, she slipped out the door, leaving Quinn to recover on the ground. Silently, she returned to Khryden’s room, stripped off her clothes and slid back into his bed. Khryden shifted in his sleep, allowing her more access to the covers and Jaesa couldn’t stop the triumphant smile that crossed her face. She had succeeded and Khryden was none the wiser. Quinn was sufficiently warned and she got a good taste of the betrayer’s terror. It had been touch and go for a moment there, but she felt amazing. This night could not have gone any better.

**Author's Note:**

> The last bit might be delayed, but who am I kidding? I tried to stick to a schedule in the beginning, but that’s obviously deteriorated. So all I will promise is that I’ll try to get it out as soon as possible. But April isn’t called cram month for nothing, and finals are approaching. **winces** But I’ll try. 
> 
> As always, drop a comment/kudos if you like! They make me smile giddily at the most inopportune times.


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